I know my blog has hit 10,000 views and above, and to thank you guys for helping me reach the goal, I present to you a blog post you will rarely see from me in any occasion because whatever is mentioned here is completely honest and from my point of view. So let's get started.
|I'd pat him.|
The real reason why I created this blog, which was 4 years back, in 2009-2010 was because I wanted to impress someone I liked in my Secondary One class. (that person was definitely not Indian nor Malay, but rather she was Chinese. If you thought of a 'he', you must have some sexual problems.) Nevertheless, I don't really feel ashamed to say it out aloud, but obviously I won't be naming people in this for it is just a casual post and not some dedicated confession. At that point of time, my blog wasn't called 'MindOfLincoln', but rather it was called 'WhashuppRubbaFace', *if I'm not wrong* and that title was clearly inspired by what my crush called me when she saw my email nickname 'RubbaFace'. At first, I decided to use my blog to impress my crush, but she didn't buy it. Hence, I decided that I should do some parodies after I made fun of my Indian classmate with a song in which I was rewarded with a smack to my back. Therefore, you can understand why my blog is half-filled with parodies and half-filled with satire as well as nonsense.
|Lousy caption is lousy.|
As time went by, I didn't really liked my crush anymore, it was just puppy love. I know you guys must be thinking : 'Woah, this dude's a complete douchebag/asshole that annoys people, how can he be so romantic and stuff like that?'. Truth is, I am super nice when I want to be nice, but you should obviously know why trolling is good for your health. As a result, I decided to revamp my blog to MindOfLincoln, in which a more 'matured' *I know it's a lie* person would take control of this used-to-be parody blog. In Secondary Two, one of my classmates told me I was constantly stared at by another female student, whom I will not name, and to my amusement, I didn't give a single sh*t at all. No really. However, due to my psychic abilities (more of situational awareness and logical inference), I managed to actually catch her staring at me. Now at that time, I only had two options. One, which was to not give half a sh*t, which might lead to either further infatuation or just completely nothing or two, which was to pretend to give a sh*t, in which I did. Body language really matters and well, clearly I could tell by now the 'staring' thing wasn't a coincidence. I'm not saying I liked her, get this clear, but rather I was aware of my current situation. And because I'm such a oh-so-good troll, I decided to message her and ask her whether she liked me, in which I told her who I was. Ultimately, the response was no, accompanied by huge signals of disgust and annoyance. Nevertheless, it didn't really bother me. But clearly it wasn't the end as I had predicted. Do note that through this post, you should know I would have deduced certain things by certain time frames. I just want to sound humble LOL.
Throughout the year, there was constant stares, brush-offs (physical contact in which I was repelled to) and maybe even gossip. (not maybe, definitely). I also detested greatly, the perfume my crush put on. And yes, I did put on a great act in front and behind of her to act the least bit interested when I really wasn't interested. Really.
|Just felt like it.|
Sorry if you had to read this long, but I'll end this post very shortly. At that point I was very clear I didn't like my crush for a simple reason. I'm not going to say it, but it's definitely not about me being a racist. *I lied*
Nah, seriously. If reality actually meant anything to her, she'd be the last person to face it. Trust me. It's as if I could read a book inside out, which I thoroughly did to my crush and realized that she was clearly out of my criteria. *Yes, it's an insult*. Another notable event is that I single-handedly, or maybe with the help of 2-3 people, owned the living sh*t out of my crush and her group as they had literally put a dustbin on my classmate's head which angered me. And when I'm angry, sh*t happens. No doubt. I chanted rather direct insults to them and obviously my crush, being a coward, stood there completely silent and awestruck. But all that's happened has already happened. All that matters is that I annoyed people like a skillful douchebag and I created this blog thanks to the first person I like. Without her, I'd probably be blog-less, much so to say having a 'kickass guide' with 10,000 views. I guess it's all about fate isn't it?
-Lincoln. *This has to be one of the rarest post ever*