The Epic Blog Of Mine

The Epic Blog Of Mine
Feel good fun.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Hello, amigo.

*drunk* Hello. Is been a long while since we meet again eh? Don't worry, I'm fine. (I know you didn't ask so I shall now wallow in self pity...NOT) This blog is not frequently updated because I'm too lazy to actually update it  personally and no fool would read this crap. But..this blog brings back memories of my parodies so I'm going to keep it...like a boss. AHHHHH.
Now, just to entertain you guys, I'm going to come up with a guide on how to be successful.

GUIDE TO BECOMING SUCCESSFUL
1. Don't be a bitch.
2. Hook up with someone.
3. There you go.
4. If this doesn't work, kill yourself.
5. If this doesn't work either, be successful.
6. Remember to troll at the same time.
7. I hate fat people.
8. I love Justin Bieber
9. ...NOT
10. Failure is the mother of success
11. Drunken grandmas are cool.
12. I'm drunk.
13. Nope, I'm not nude.
14. BITCHASS.
15. Don't give up on your dreams.
16. I'm not talking about sleep, idiot.
17. Actually, I was. *laughs*
18. Now bang your head against the wall.
19. If you feel the pain, repeat step 18 again until satisfied.
20. Thank you for spending constructive time here.
21. ...NOT.

-Lincoln